By Rachel Papcun
So, quitters never get ahead, right? Well, at least that’s what they say. Who are they, anyway? Here are five things to throw the towel at right now, and feel awesome about it:
One: Trying to Please Everyone
The key word here being everyone. You can try really, really, really hard, but there are stars in the sky as to the odds of that happening. And that’s okay! Think of how beautiful this world is in its diversity. All kinds of life forms are a necessity to make this planet an interesting place. We live in different worlds right alongside each other, including 7 billion humans, and sometimes we step on each other’s toes. It is amiable to wear many different hats throughout a thoroughly packed life, yet we often lose awareness of ourselves in doing so relentlessly. Your health and well-being has to come before anyone else’s or you won’t be able to do anything for them. Besides that, how many people have you been a bit disappointed or less than thrilled with? It happens. Your partner expects this, your boss expects that. Instead of driving yourself crazy, balance yourself between you and the people who care about you, because you’ll probably never please someone who doesn’t. Only you can decide what is important to you.
Two: Fearing Change
Oh, the comfort of familiarity. The warm fuzzy of knowing exactly where you stand in the universe. But how do you really know what is going to happen in the next moment? We don’t and that is understandably scary. We have expectations or intuitions, but we don’t really know. Some of us go through life hoping that nothing will ever be different, so content, and when something does diverge it’s devastating. Some of us are the opposite, longing for a new scene but paralyzed in place from taking step one. Remember that the universe is made up of parallels: If you are motionless, something will come along eventually to move you, whether you like it or not. We can control change about as much as we can control the weather. Whether it’s a relationship, a job, or a lifestyle change, making yourself open to the universe’s whim is frightening. Just making an effort, however, will move the molecules within and around you. You might not ace the test, but you’ll get an E for effort. Come out of your cocoon and swan dive into that black hole — your courage will be there to catch you. Besides, what would you attempt if you knew you would not fail? (See: Smash Mouth’s All Star)
Three: Living In The Past
Like a burnt lasagna, it is done. All the DeLoreans and Doc Browns in the universe can’t bring us back to our own 1955 (at least, not yet). Regret and feelings of guilt are two of the most debilitating habits we can become addicted to. You screwed up. Someone screwed you up. Time does not know the difference between a billion years and a nanosecond. Take what you’ve learned and put it in your survival pack. Open your arms and embrace what the future holds for you. You’ll more than likely be pleasantly surprised by what it gives to you as it hugs you back.
Four: Putting Yourself Down
Most of us are not sociopaths who think very highly of ourselves and think everything we do is correct. No one wants to be a downer or a complainer, but it often seems like our inner voice is whacking at the back of our kneecaps instead of lifting us to the top of the cheerleader pyramid. Why are we so hard on ourselves? There is no instruction manual for life because we are not IKEA furniture. Who can understand those things, anyway? Even if you were given a life manual, would you really want to follow it? You possess qualities like no other and they are beautiful — don’t let anyone convince you otherwise. You are behind the wheel of your life. A little self-actualization is healthy, but not to the point where you feel invaluable. Negative thoughts and people are like vampires and vacuums — they suck. Toss those negative thoughts and people in your life from your energy vehicle, of which you are the sole operator. Place a big sign above your driver’s seat: “No energy suckers allowed!”
Even analysts can overthink. Using your brain keeps it pliable and sharp, but when your focus becomes narrower and narrower, the tunnel becomes longer and longer. Then fear and indecision wrap their cold tentacles around you, dunking your brain into a Slurpee bath. No more forest, only a fern. Now your mental processes are a skipping record. Take a step back and place the needle on a different track. You won’t know until you take action and do. Wear the pink dress or suit. Quit the job that is hurting your soul. Exit the relationship that has you feeling unfulfilled. Be yourself — you and others will love you so much more if you do.
Image, The Huffington Post.